We have two identities: Our shame-based identity harbored in our souls, and our grace-based identity that has been received into our spirits. We have talked plenty about both of these. But here is something else.
There is a third concept for us to understand, and it is called the False Self. This is actually a false identity. An actor. A facade. The false self is what we reveal when we hide the other two identities. It’s the “amazing and wonderful person we want the world to behold,” when others see us.
The False Self is my most awesome, beautiful, confident, accomplished, successful, disciplined, fabulous person that I present to you at school, at work, at our children’s functions, and especially at church, so that you will always believe that I am one of the most awesome, beautiful, confident, accomplished, successful, disciplined, and fabulous people you have ever met. And the hope is that I could get you to feel less than such. If you do, mission accomplished.
The False Self is the creation of my flesh; thus, it is my flesh. My flesh is all the ways apart from God that I protect myself, provide for myself, promote myself and pleasure myself. And for me to be successful in these four endeavors, I must create this awesome and amazing persona, to control you, control myself, and get what I need in life.
My first False Self was created around my sophomore year in high school. Remember, I was skinny, shy and lacking in self-confidence . . . and then I discovered basketball. I couldn’t do anything about being skinny, but if this skinny dude could out jump you, out shoot you, draw a foul on you, and sink the free throw, well, then, I could come close to being awesome and amazing. “Skinny White Boy Who Can Play,” was my first serious False Self. And it grew, too. “Skinny White Boy Earns Respect – Feared on the Basketball Court,” was my identity during my junior year. It was a mouth full, but I could say it to myself as I walked down the hall.
Are you catching on?
Then I went to Bible College, played on the basketball team there, and extended the promotion of my False Self for another couple of years. But the basketball False Self came to an end when I transferred to another Christian college. At this college I assumed a new false self: Philosophy major. Yes, it’s possible I was a little arrogant about the fact that I majored in philosophy. Very few people major in philosophy, after all. Our department is regarded as the deeper thinkers on campus. Oooooooh, cha-chang! A more intimidating False Self than “Former Basketball Player.”
But what a terrible thing to do to your heart; to major in arrogance, pretension and self-righteousness. To actually choose a major in college that is built around your need to be awesome and amazing. (But don’t worry, Mom and Dad, we didn’t waste all the money! Remember, I thrilled your hearts by also singing in the Men’s Glee Club!!!)
My third false self came sometime during seminary or afterwards: “Preacher Man.” This next fleshly sub-identity that I presented for everyone’s approval down at church was being “The Amazing Bible Teacher-Preacha’ Man.” My fleshly drive in life was to write clever sermons, with outstanding quotes, from famous people (of whose rank and file I would surely be some day!), so that hopefully you would hear my sermon, rise, take off your hat and place it over your heart as you say, “My, wasn’t that the best thing I’ve heard all week.”
This False Self eventually yielded to this most damning manifestation of my flesh. My final (hopefully) fleshly identity was, “The Smartest Man in the Room.” I cringe even to type that. I have just nearly humbled myself to the point of humiliation. I’m so sorry to anyone I have hurt because of this false self. Please forgive me for this fleshly need to be recognized as . . . “smarter than you.” I have only come to see this False Identity in the last few years.
Here’s three points.
- This False Self needs to be renounced, forsaken and crucified on the cross. We crucify the flesh.
- However, the Shame-based Identity needs to be healed, restored and renewed by Christ’s life.
- The Grace-based Identity is the Life of Christ in my spirit. It is the life that moves, by the Holy Spirit, into my soul, transforming the shame into the glory of Christ.
On your way to changing at the level of Identity, be aware of your False Self.
Carter
(Now, I hope I have stirred up your thoughts. Leave a comment below and tell me in 2-3 words what your False Self was back in High School.)